​As women we're wired to nurture those around us. As Christians we've been taught JOY stands for Jesus, Others and then Yourself. But IMHO that's backwards. How can we give to others if we're burned out, frustrated or just plain empty?
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The reasoning is because we benefit from doing things for others, and that's true! But too often this leads to many of the symptoms mentioned in my previous paragraph.

Many people have their own ideas of what "self-care" means, but for me, this does not have to be complicated or costly. Think about what you love to do...

Do you love to read? Take a walk? Sit out in nature? Indulge in a bath with candles and music? These are all forms of self-care. Many times we wait for others to do things for us that make us feel loved and pampered- and that's fine too, but we need to love and pamper ourselves.

"But I don't have time!" You say.

Let's think about this for a moment. How much do you do for others while neglecting your own needs? 

This is unhealthy and out of balance.

Look at your day/week/month with a critical eye and see where you can carve out a few minutes each day, one day a week or a couple of days every month and schedule a massage or visit to a reflexologist or chiropractor. Have a manicure and/or pedicure or whatever you can do to recalibrate your nervous system and reconnect with yourself, your dreams and God.

In other words, have some much needed "Me Time." 

Here are a few more ideas...

Read a book for the sheer pleasure of it.
Take yourself on a picnic or for a walk in the park.
Buy yourself some flowers or a new outfit - again for the pleasure it brings you.

If we want to nurture others, we must nurture ourselves also.

Something to think about!
"Inspirational with an Edge! ™
"Coaching in Pjs" ™

PS: Read The Art of Extreme Self-Care: 12 Practical and Inspiring Ways to Love Yourself More  by Cheryl Richardson for beautiful ideas to transform your life "one month at a time."

Today on @CoachingInPJs™ we’re discussing stress. We all know stress is the number one killer in the world today. Stress can kill your dreams, kill your relationships and can even kill YOU.
 
Think about this for a moment. You're zooming right along in your life. Happy-go-lucky. Everything is honky-dory when suddenly you find yourself thinking about what's on your To Do list, the work stacked on your desk or laundry piled up at home, what so-and-so just said. Pretty soon your emotions are engaged and you're ready to either whip the world, throw in the towel, or curl up in a fetal position until someone comes along and rescues you out of the pit of negativity you’ve just spiraled into. 

How did this happen, you wonder?

It happened when you allowed your mind to start wandering and worrying!
 
Stress Begins in the Mind.

This is why it's important to stay in the present moment and keep those thoughts from lollygagging along on any trajectory they choose.

So, how can you reel yourself in once you're in a state of stress or panic?

*Take a Breath. I’m not talking about a short inhale but a belly-deep, diaphragm-full, from the bottom of your heart and soul breath. When you get to the top and are ready to exhale, close your eyes and say to yourself, “Stop. Just stop.” This will start to quiet the mind and calm the body. Do this as long as you can, or have to, but a minimum of 3 minutes.
 
* Tap and talk your way out. While taking those deep breaths and telling your mind to stop, tap gently on your heart. EFT or tapping is a process that calms the amygdala (the flight, fight or freeze mechanism in the brain) and soothes the body’s nervous system.
 
*Count. We’ve all heard, “before you react or respond, take a deep breath and count to 10.” This is great advice, but I’m challenging you to count backward from 10. Mel Robbins changed her entire life, and helped others change theirs while creating a whole culture of people counting backward from 5 with her “5 second rule.” If 5 seconds works for millions, imagine how counting from 10 to 0 can help you! You may wonder why we’re counting backwards. Well, the brain already knows how to count from 1 to 10 forwards, but backwards is not “normal,” and it interrupts the thought pattern that has been carved into your gray matter from years of negative, stressful thoughts.
 
*Journal. After you’ve pulled yourself up out of that pit you spiraled into, create a vision in your mind about how you want your holidays to be. This can be as simple as a 3x5 index card with, “Every holiday celebration this year is blissful, joyous and harmonious,” written on it. OR let your imagination run wild and write this in your journal with as much detail as you can. Consider where the party/parties will be, what you will serve, who will be there, how much fun it will all be. Even if you believe in this moment that it’s an absolute fantasy, fantasize away! Abraham Hicks calls this pre-paving the way. Neville Goddard calls this the law of assumption or living from the end and in the world of manifestation, visualizing with as much sensory detail you can provide and deep emotion, is key to changing or creating the life you desire.
 
These are the tips, tricks and hacks I shared in my YouTube video but here are a few more you can try…
 
*Organize your tasks at home and at work and prioritize your to-do (and gift) lists. Being on top of things gives us a sense of control as well as pride and joy when things run smoothly and turn out well.
 
*Pray. Remember when the tough gets going, the tough get on their knees. Prayer is a surefire way to bring peace to the mind, heart, soul and body. This can be as simple as inhaling, “peace be still,” and exhaling, “thank you.”
 
*Forgive so-and-so. Forgive Yourself. As a Ho'oponopono practitioner I’ve seen this ancient Hawaiian prayer work wonders in my life and the lives of others.

*Last but not least, remember, your power is in the present moment. In the now.
 
When your thoughts start to wander down the slippery slope of negative memories from past experiences, take control before those judgments become intense emotions that cause the levels of stress hormones in your body to rise, take over your mind and steal your joy.

Something to think about!
"Inspirational with an Edge! ™
"Coaching in Pjs" ™